I'm glad I've realized what happens to me when someone has treated me wrong, weird, or indifferent, and then they go on like nothing has happened and I'm stuck to deal with it.
God showed me this like a movie in my head, I even felt the feelings, right along with seeing the visual. This wisdom was so good to me this morning, that I have to share it with YOU. Some things are just to awesome to keep for yourself!
When something happens in a relationship with someone, that's not quite on the, up and up, they say, or do something, that would be considered "wrong", I usually will first classify those things as hmmm...that was weird, I don't always go off, so to speak. I normally give people the benefit of doubt, - then depending on the situation, - confusion, hurt and anger could set in, - if the situation is that wrong. Most of the time, thank God, I work in the, "wow, that was weird, or hmmm... that is unusual." when I've been put in the "this is really wrong" type of situations. The situations that cause confusion, hurt or the ones that make us angry, are what I'm focusing on in this blog. Those are the ones that can disrupt our life the worse. The hmmm's.... we can usually walk away from.
For me, I don't like bad feelings about a situation or a person, so I'm constantly trying to figure out how can I help or fix the situation. I'll wake up, thinking, how can I fix this? My whole day can be filled with the, "What can I do?" "How can I make this right?" "What can I do to help them?"
My goodness, it can be time consuming, and worse, life consuming! We can be so focused on fixing something we can't fix, that we miss doing the life we're supposed to have. Not good.
None of these type of emotions or feelings are good! When we are confused, hurt or angry over what someone else has put in our life, and when we didn't ask for it, those are the emotions that could send us off into fixing mode. Those are real emotions and those of us who deal with them try to see what we can do, and then, look, - we are the ones trying to fix it!
Think on that for a minute... Not good! Not good at all.
The wisdom is this, we don't have to fix anything. And, there's no fixing it, when it's their problem to begin with. Get off their wheel! It will be a constant circle with no end.
That could sound harsh, especially to a fixer like me. I'm a fixer, a mentor and I love sharing what God has done for me. I don't like having bad emotions stirred up in me. I like my peace. That said, those bad feelings have me constantly jumping back up on their Ferris Wheel, so to speak, trying to fix it. Nothing happens, but a very long ride on their wheel. I see no end. A reminder here, it's THEIR Ferris Wheel. Think on that for a minute.
Waking up in the morning, thinking on how we can fix the situation, what can we do, what could we have said to help them, what one thing could we have done to help them see?
Well, we can't. If they are the ones dumping all the time and it's all about them, well, it's going to be all about them for a very long time. Another very good thought is, - no one likes riding alone, - but don't be their guest on a non-stop wheel.
And guess what, we are not to feel guilty. No guilt, no shame, no blame. We are not to feel bad getting off this ride. Guilt is always an emotion that is used to get us on the wheel. Don't.
Think on this, who, put who, on the wheel? If you're putting people on your wheel, STOP.
If someone is putting you on their wheel, GET OFF!
I was like WOW this morning! Talking to the Lord was very good this morning, well, I was actually listening. He knows, and is full of love and wisdom. I like listening to Him.
I'm getting off the Ferris Wheel, never was a fan of those anyway. How about you?
Smiles and Hugs to YOU today,